Saturday, August 28, 2010

PP has it out with Revenue Canada

We unified our taxes here in the good old province of Ontario (and maybe nationally..i have no idea, i dont really keep up with the other provinces or territories). We used to pay 2 taxes, but now we have the HST (harmonized sales tax) which is a whopping 13%.

The government issued HST transition credits to people living here who made under 80K/year, which is me. Its $100 3 times. I know it isnt much, but it pays for my plane ticket to Florida in November.

Anyway - I didnt get it. So my accountant encourages me to call and find out why. The following is an abridged, but 100% accurate conversation of the conversation I have with Revenue Canada.

RC: How can i help you?
PP: I didnt get the transionary credit - can you tell me why?
RC: You are not a resident of Canada
PP: ....Pardon?
RC: You are considered an immigrant to this country by RevCan.
PP:...Pardon?
RC: Going back to 2004, you left the country for an extended period of time, and never notified us that you were back
PP: But - I split taxes for both countries in the year that I was gone, and have paid taxes every year in this country since I came back. And checked "Ontario" on the page where it asks you to state what province you live in - AND have received all tax credits over the past 6 years. What does my address say sir?
RC: Mam - if you dont stop screaming at me - I will end this call

*at this point, it is valid to say that I was not screaming, and did not have attitude - my mom can verify this - this guy was just a total douche*

PP: im actually not screaming - what does my mailing address say sir? Where does it say that I live?
RC: doesnt matter - you could live out of the country and be using a mailing address for Canada
PP: Are you accusing me of committing Fraud?
RC: Stop screaming at me (Again, not screaming)
PP: can you please start recording the conversation, to prove that I am not screaming?
RC: No, I cannot do that - It is illegal to record calls at Revenue Canada
PP: but i'm asking you to
RC: it is illegal
PP: A friend of mine is a lawyer there - i'll be sure to follow up on that

PP: So - im an immigrant to Canada - How was I supposed to know that I was supposed to tell you that I was living in canada - isnt my tax return enough? I go shopping every month in the states, does that mean that I have to notify RC of my return to the country everytime I go shopping and come back. Like, how was I supposed to know to call you guys, especially since i've been submitting tax returns yearly - and all of my employers are in Ontario, and my return SAYS that I live in Ontario
RC: Mam - stop screaming at me - you are not considered a resident of the country.
PP: Im not screaming - im asking. If you want me to scream, I will. But I digress - is this accurate, am I an immigrant to Canada everytime I go shopping in the states?
RC: This is the last time im telling you to stop screaming at me - or I will end this call

PP: Do you have a name, and employee number?
RC: Yes I do
PP: Can I have it?
RC: gives me his name and employee number - Why do you want those things?
PP: To file an official complaint against you of course
RC: *his voice gets frantic at this point* - Why would you do that? Why would you file a complaint against me? Because im telling you the truth
PP: No - because I asked questions, you didnt answer them, or tell me how to fix this, all you did was accuse me of Fraud and screaming. Is your uspervisor there?
RC: we dont have supervisors
PP: you dont have a boss? Who do you answer to in the day?
RC: I dont know - Why are you going to file a complaint against me
PP: Because quite frankly, you're an asshole.

Thats when i slammed the phone down...although, i probably wont file one.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

So much for year of the Tiger - More like Year of the Ex!

I dont know whats happened this year to me - or if this is a common thing with all people - but I have had a substantial number of ex's (Ex everythings, boyfriends etc....) call me up to see how im doing, and to try to rekindle - or not, just legitimately call to see how im doing - whatever we had before. From March of this year, until just this past Friday - my phone has been a hotbed of ex texts and calls - the curse of having the same cell phone number for almost 10 years I suppose.

I know that this doesnt seem like much - but i'm prepared to follow up with some examples. Every story is true - and I have indeed blogged about all of these "men" (and I use the term loosely) before.

E - We went on 2 dates, 2 years ago. I'm out for lunch with Miss A, and start getting these random texts to which I reply "Who is this" (All of them go that way, i never save phone numbers)...and he tells me, and asks me to readd him on msn - cause i never save email addresses either. I add him, and am reminded of how hot he is, and we've been hanging out since March. He annoyed me 2 years ago - but we're both older now, and its great this time. We've had some good times.

M - We became friends a month before me and someone else broke up last year. I knew that M was moving to San Fran in September - so when me and the other dude broke up in July, me and M hung out for 2 months, until he left. We both knew it would be very short term. A WEEK after E texts me out of the blue, I get a call from M, hes moving back to town he wants to hang out and see where things go - we catch up, but nothing comes of it. Although, I get random texts asking if he can come over - i never answer them.

M - We had a few dates, but were better friends. I was much more attracted to who i pictured when i talked to him on the phone, than i was when we were together. It didnt work, but he ended up moving to Montreal I guess. Earlier this year, I get a text "Who's this" is my reply, and he proceeds to tell me - and that he is in town for a wedding the next day, can we please go for dinner - he really misses me, etc etc etc. I never did, but still....

M - my ex...from when i was 25. Finds me on FB and says that he misses me - and that he feels like he's been a terrible friend - im a great fantastic etc person and he wants to reconnect. He calls (cause I have the same number still)...we breifly catch up. Neither one of us ever calls the other again, although I have gotten some FB messages about how i havent called again...

S - A Cop...from last year. We met through work...we go on a date, we go on a second date. At this point, he tells me that he's married and just looking for something on the side. I get up and leave. I get a text message last week "Who's this" is my reply...its S. He's wondering if i've reconsidered. I never responded.

G - A guy I had something with 9 years ago. NINE YEARS AGO....he got married, we sort of kept in touch. He's busy, im busy - we havent talked in 2 years. I deleted him off of everything. FRIDAY, he finds me on msn. I guess I deleted him, but didnt block him. He's divorced now. His first question is - When can i come visit.

G - another cop....who i suspected was married but could never prove....calls me out of the blue after a few months, and asks me to hang out again.

My question to all of these people was - "Why do you still have my phone number"...which I think is a fair, and legitimate question. Seriously. This isnt like, last week we talked, and got into a fight, and want to reconnect. This is YEARS of not talking, and people still having my phone number. Every time I asked that question, I always got the same response, that ran something along the lines of "Just incase I wondered about you". I never save phone numbers or email addresses - once you're gone out of my life, you're gone. If I hold onto your contact info - i'll probably use it. So i get rid of it.

I dont WANT to change my phone number, as i've had it for so long, and everyone has it - but seriously. There are some exes that i definitely dont want to hear from. Does this happen to anyone else?

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Saturday Driving

I came to my parents this weekend to go to the drive in with LD. (I invited Ash...but no reply yet. her poor ankle. :o) I also came here to pay some bills that come to my parents house that I have to pay in person. Its a shitty system - but im such a transient gypsy, that im usually never in an address for more than a year. No point in changing all of my mail until I settle.

Heres one thing I dont understand about drivers - WHY do you drive in the fast lane, if you're not passing anyone? Its such a simple concept - pass, and get over. Simple. I drive fast. I wont lie - Of all the times i ever have driven in the past 16 years since getting my license (EEK!!!), Im SHOCKED that I havent gotten more speeding tickets. IN FACT - the only speeding ticket i've ever gotten in my entire life, was just last year - for going 45km/h in a 40 zone. Seriously. The ticket was $27.50.

Of all the times that ive driven - and the people who know me who read this blog can attest that I am indeed an "Exciting" driver - im counting my blessings that i've only ever been pulled over once, and 5km over, isnt even speeding. But I digress....

I left my apartment this morning, and drove down to my parents - at 8am-ish. Traffic. No joke. So of course it takes me almost 2 hours to get here, but as im driving, and hitting pockets of traffic, I finally get to the end of each jam, to find 2 or 3 cars driving relatively the same speed across all lanes. 80km/h. Sigh. So after passing all of these idiots finally, I cant help but think (as i listen to the Cult - which also increases my average driving speed), that these three people were the reason that I was just stuck in traffic for 35 minutes.

This post also reminds me of a great story I used as my facebook status a couple of months ago - it reads something like this( I cant find it): I raced you all the way to Niagara, but I saw the cop first - I cant even imagine how expensive your ticket was going as fast as you were.

Pass - get over - repeat.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

A beautiful day in the neighborhood

Notable things that happened on PP's drive to work today:

Police were directing traffic at Dundas and Coxwell. I snapped a picture - but it turned out to be really boring of a cop standing in the middle of the intersection, so i decided to use this one instead - id say that that was a fairly accurate description of my drive to work this morning.

And as i sat there - for 19 minutes waiting for my turn to go - I couldnt help but wonder the following things about this poor bloke standing in the middle of it all.

1. Who do you have to piss off at the office to get this gig?

2. Why do they flip their hands around like the Queen of England...does it have to be so dramatic, and flippy...or can it be more solid, and less "look at me showing off my huge engagement ring"

I ALSO saw a rather large woman - who graced the intersection of Broadview and Dundas with her GIGANTIC braless boobs, that hung down to her hipbone at least. Best part - she was wearing a shirt that looked like this, and everything was visible. I did not take a picture.



I got to Dundas and River - which is ALWAYS exciting because this is the first intersection of Regent Park. And right at this corner - there is a house they always talk about on the Dean Blundell Morning show. Its the house that put their inside table outside on the front lawn. There's usually a bunch of people hanging out smoking - doesnt matter what hour. Which also means there there are usually cops. At 11:30am, it was a full out rocking party, complete with music, coolers of beer, and cops.

And then I got to Sherbourne and Dundas - the worst, and most dangerous intersection in Toronto (as rated this past year in the newspaper). And of course the usual riff raff were out - Woman holding her crack pipe and screaming at man - and then man chasing her down the street. Another man carrying a womans backpack, screaming at each other - and man throwing the backpack in the street and telling her to carry it herself (she couldnt I imagine from the 2 cases of beer she was holding). Cops at this corner too.

After this, I turned on to sherbourne to get to work - and all of the excitement stopped. They werent even filming on Sherbourne today - but I heard on the radio it was closed between Dundas and Gerrard for a police investigation. I either missed the action, or drove right through the crime scene....

Isnt Toronto GREAT?!?!

Monday, August 16, 2010

Correction

Please note that I spelled Missy Agravation's name wrong....and am pissed at myself becuase when i said that she was an awesome chica and all around party girl - I should have added that she's known for rubbing bad charms with holy fingers.

Dammit. I must have been sick when i wrote that - to let that one get away from me.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Im hot..and stuff.

Ive been working on a new post - which i described to Miss Ash tonight, and she laughed and told me to blog it in parts since it would be TOO long to do in one post. Its taking me a long time to come up with parts to the post - but once you see it you'll understand why. And i dont want to blog it in parts - because it will give me a reason to review it and recognize that i forgot things i wanted to say....and whats the point of fixing part 1 if youre already on part 3?

Please note a new addition to my blog roll. An awesome Chica, and all around Party Girl: Missy Aggrivation.

I have the stupid Dog wedding tomorrow. Im working for the day, and then headed to Niagara for the reception so im actually missing the dog part - but my brother in law is the professional photographer for this wedding...so i'm sure the pictures, will be ridiculous. And available here once i get my hands on them.

The only shitty thing, besides a dog in a tutu leading the wedding party - i cant fathom how i am sick...AGAIN. But im sitting here, unable to taste or breathe with kleenex shoved up my nose to prevent it from dripping - and it stops the sniffling if you only have your mouth to breath through.

i know. im hot. Get over it.

Friday, August 06, 2010

August

Ok - So after this week's freak out - ive decided that its time to get my ass in gear and get back to what i planned ohh....2 months ago.

I havent even TOUCHED a book....ive been working out 1 day a week instead of 5....ive been eating cupcakes (although, it seems to be the theme of this summer and everyone is blogging cupcakes!!! so i dont feel so bad about that one.) I havent taken one road trip....etc...etc...etc...It was supposed to be the summer of PP...and so far, it SUCKS. Except I have a really nice tan.

I even put off the new guy - and explained that if he didnt want to wait, that there would be other hot doctors around. (not so much in those words...but i dont plan on hearing from him ever again...)

I do realize that its August 6 already but better late than never.

One thing i DID do - was go to Harry Potter Exhibit at the Science Center. This has been on my "To Do" list since April. If you are a fan of the movies, this exhibit was amazing!!! There were so many movie props, they recreated Hagrid's hut, and had an exact full size replica of the entrance to the Great Hall with all the Decrees on it from the 5th movie! I try to buy the exhibit book if something I go to was REALLY great, to have it as a momento. I definitely bought this one. (The only exhibit that I went to, that I never found an exhibit book for was the Clash exhibit at the rock and roll hall of fame a couple of years ago...)

On another aside - My family has been talking about going to Florida for my birthday this year - now i usually go to Vegas with a friend of mine to celebrate both of our birthdays, but shes busy this year, and my family was talking about Florida. I have been asking when, so that i could book the time off work - but no one could seem to get themselves organized.

I open my email the other day, to find a ticket confirmation. I'll be in orlando from the 29th of October until the 5th of November. Halloween night at Universal afterhours??? YES PLEASE. Harry Potter theme Park??? YES PLEASE!!! Florida on mom and dad's tab??? YES PLEASE!

So...things arent ALL bad. But Florida in 3 months? Im done with the cupcakes....at least until i get back.

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

Fuck Everything.

Fuck my last post...Fuck Karma. Karma is bullshit.

After I posted that - I had the WORST day at work....fuck people who lie straight to your face. Fuck people who steal. Fuck incident reports. Fuck 12.5 hour days. Fuck sunburns....

OH. And Fuck smashing my knee off the desk and getting an immediate bruise.

Tuesday, August 03, 2010

Tuesday Shenanigans

Following up a long weekend - where I spent a lot of time doing the following (in no particular order): Cooking, Cleaning, Shopping, hanging out with friends (And I met someone im interested in getting to know better - so we'll see where that goes....)

I followed up the weekend with Great conversations and a short, but effective meeting at work today (even though im working 4-12 this week, I had to come in 9-11 for staff meeting).

After this - I went home and hooked up with a friend for a walk on the beach. On my way there - I found a gorgeous diamond ring laying on the street. I picked it up, and looked up the stamp inside. Its legit people. So i posted it on Craigslist, and Kijiji. So if any of your friends were irresponsible with their diamond engagement rings in the beaches area of Toronto, let me know. I might have their ring.

After that, I went walking on the beach with my friend. After I went home, and felt my face getting cunchy. I left for work and by 6pm, my face is the same color as a tomato. I seriously look like Tickle Me elmo right now. Sigh...and worst of all - i feel sick to my stomach - so im thinking too much sun. And if I feel sick tomorrow too - im calling in sick.

Thursday im off cause I am headed to the Science Center for the Harry Potter exhibit. and have a number of people coming into the city for this exciting adventure.

Friday I have my first counselling session for this. I have spoken to a number of people about my work problem, and all have agreed that counselling is the way to go just to wrap my head around how to maintain a better level of professionalism.

I think that about sums up my week - next week I will have my first date with "the new guy"....i TRIED explaining my goal list to him. He doesnt want to wait until September....and neither do I. Hes pretty cute. Wish me luck!

Then I came into work, and bought a scratch ticket, which I havent done in a year easy. My lucky symbol on the card was a diamond ring - and I won 4 dollars! Yippee....does anyone believe in signs???