Friday, October 20, 2006

Being Accosted, and Avoiding it at all Costs

Okay...so i'll fully admit that im a bit of a dummy around guys, and generally have no clue that they are hitting on me, but sometimes...theres always that one. The one that's so obvious, its actually quite frightening. I met such a man this past Sunday. (Sunday, even before I stepped on the snake)

I have to get gas. Monty *thats my car* is running on fumes, and is decidedly hungry.

I go in to pay, and the guy inside strikes up general conversation while I am paying. He asks about what I am doing the rest of the day, as he gets off work in less than an hour, and doesnt really have any plans (Of course that means its a good idea to ask a stranger what they are doing)

I tell him that I am going to Brock (local university) to get some homework done. He looks shocked by this...and says

Gas Man: "You're still in school???" (quite obviously shocked)
Me: "Uhhh....(pause)....yeah?"
Gas Man: "You're not married?" (I have little idea of how the two are related)
Me: "......(pause first this time)....Uhh....No?"
Gas Man: "A pretty thing like you? What are you studying?"
Me: "Erm...education?"
Gas Man: "Ohhh kids. I want kids. Do you have any kids?"
Me: (This time, I say nothing, just stare)
Gas Man: "What, you dont have kids? Dont you want any kids? You'd have beautiful children, I think you should have them. You'd really like them, plus they'd be beautiful"
Me: (rushing to get my things into my purse waiting for my transaction to go through, and unable to look at this man any longer)....I dont really like kids
Gas Man: (Laughs)...you are an interesting woman. You dont like kids, but you're in education. Why dont you want kids? Your children would be beautiful. I want kids. Why dont you?"
Me: "uhh....i dont know?"
Gas Man: "i'd like to sit down and talk to you about this more....you're an interesting beautiful woman"
**Transaction goes through finally. I had to do it twice, which didnt help matters**
Me: "ohh....uhh...ya. No, I dont think so. Bye"

I go back to my car, where I have someone waiting...

S: "What took you so long"
**I told him this story
S:"tsk tsk....5 date Challenge!!!"
Me: (I gave him the slit eye) Shut. Up.

True Story.

19 comments:

Miss Ash said...

Nice LOL, was he a looker? I still have my quota of dates to fill up :P

Phil said...

LOL! I think you should have gone out with him just so you could tell us the story!

Sexy Suburbanite said...

He he! That is toooooo funny PP!! Oh, on Thursday I got a really interesting pick up line from some creepy guy. He said "If beautiful was a minute you'd be an hour." Oh dear. Has that ever worked? I mean, tell me one time in the history of man where some woman responded to that pick up line with "Take me I'm yours!" Seriously.

Trib said...

You should have taken him up! If you'd played your cards right you could've gotten a free cup of coffee.

Princess Pessimism said...

Ash - He was NOT a looker.

Philly - Wasnt that story enough?

Sexy - I HIGHLY doubt that that could ever work. You should have asked.

Trib - HAHA!!! Ya, maybe.

Jennifer said...

Free cup of coffee? A good story? Trib, Phil, if you read that conversation, our gas clerk friend was not offering coffee or laughs, just impregnation. *shudder*
This post was way grosser than the snake one, bleh, gross boys who want to talk reproduction.

Lindsey said...

Fucking wierdos. The guy at my corner gas station talks to me EVERY morning. Keeps telling me how much I look like his old girlfriend in India and every time he sees me he thinks of her.

slopmaster said...

you're a wimp for not doing the 5 date challenge. If nothing else, you'll have good blogging material.

"you look like me ex girlfriend in India. Would you like a jelly donut?"

Princess Pessimism said...

Jennifer - LOL!!! Yes, that is true. and I wouldnt have taken the coffee, or donut either.

Linny - Thats so odd....

Slop - I love how you only comment on my blog when you can insult me.

Amichai said...

I know this isn't about your post, but as to Sexy Suburbanite (if that is indeed her real name) I love that pick up line.

I have only once picked up a total stranger. I don't know how other guys do it. I was only able to do what I did due to very specific circumstances, out of that, I would have no idea what to do.

But thanks to this post, I know a little more of what not to do.

Also I'd have to agree with jennifer. The dude did want to date, he just wanted to father your beautiful children

Princess Pessimism said...

Amichai - if you are indeed looking to pick someone up, and I assume you arent becuse of your current situation, just dont be creepy about it. Dont talk about having kids, or marriange right away. That is a definite deterrant to getting a date.

Jennifer said...

I don't get why people don't understand someone who wants to teach but doesn't want to have children. The difference between teaching and having children is huge.
It's like the difference between your gas clerk friend going to work and selling gas 8 or 12 hours a day, and him building an oil well in his backyard, refining the oil in his kitchen and selling it from a pump in his front yard 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for the next 18 to 30 years or until he dies.

Jennifer said...

Oh right, and not getting paid for it.

Princess Pessimism said...

Jennifer - I totally see your point,a nd couldnt agree more. Ive spent everyday of my working life, with children or for children. Then I have my neices on the weekends, and sometimes during the week. that is more than enough for me.

Katie said...

it did give you something to post about...

Big Ben said...

Ugly people should not have babies, you should have babies.

Steven Novak said...

I'm in agreement with the guy above that said you should have gone out with him just to get a funny story.

You might end up dead...but, well...that might be a funny story as well...maybe... ;)

Steve~

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