Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Ponderables...

Subject: Rigor Mortis

I know that it can last up to 72 hours....So i have a question.

Does Rigor Mortis affect the penis?? Do dead men maintain an erection for up to 72 hours?

I know that in some faiths, it is customary to bury the body within 24 hours of death....this may pose as a problem.

Doctors?? Morticians?? Inquiring minds want to know.

** To set all of your disgusting minds at ease. NO, I do not want to know for personal reasons. SICK Rawbean...sick...

Jennifer's picture of the dead bird was the inspiration for this ponderable. I made a joke about a rigor mortis christmas card, and one thing led to another...its how my mind works, and I refuse to apologize on it's behalf.

23 comments:

rawbean said...

The bigger question is...why do YOU want to know this...you're not thinking of breaking into some morgues are you?

Princess Pessimism said...

Fuck...you know, as soon as I posted this..i KNEW someone would make some gross joke about it....LOL...

I'm updating my blog...i can just imagine the amount of jokes that are going to end up in here.

yrautca said...

Various questions:

1) should you call doctor if it lasts more than 4 hours?

2) if died during sex, chances of not being able to exit?

3) if suffered from ED when alive, reaction after death?

4) are you more valuable to her dead or alive?

5) enough room in coffin for an erect member?

This is thought provoking.

Princess Pessimism said...

Yrautca - I wonder if a man who suffered from erectile disfunction in life, would have this problem, in death.

Trib said...

Okay, so you remember how myofibrils work? Good. Well, you have little golf clubs that want to attach to a little climbing rope and climb up it, the little climbing rope is covered with jelly beans that don't let the golf clubs attach. When you want to let the golf clubs climb the rope you let in some Calcium that moves the jelly beans out of the way. In order for the golf club to let go of the climbing rope, ATP has to bind to it. When shit goes bad for a muscle cell which is awhile after your brain dies, Calcium comes in, the golf-clubs grab the rope, but there isn't ATP around for them to let go. They stay stuck like that until the golf-clubs and climbing rope start falling apart.
Rigor mortis does not affect the penis, but livor mortis can. That is the settling of blood (why dead people are light on top and dark on the bottom except where boniness keeps the blood from settling). So if they were face down, the settling blood can give them an erection. Most dead men don't have erections from what I've seen. But if they get an erection from settling blood, it doesn't go away.
And for yrautca:
1.Yes 2.No 3.See above 4.Dead 5.Yes

Princess Pessimism said...

Trib - Sorry dude, you lost me at myosomething or other.

However, thank you for answering my question....oh ya..and all of yrautcas too.

Miss Ash said...

Sicko LOL

yrautca said...

Question for trib:

can the mortician (or whatever they are called) draw blood from dead penis to make it soft?

Princess Pessimism said...

Miss Ash - Oh whatever! LOL...Get your mind out of the gutter. Its a legitimate question....

Yrautca - Good question.

rawbean said...

Whoah Trib...golf clubs? jelly beans? Oh you.

Trib said...

Here's a picture
The myosin is the golf clubs, the actin is the climbing rope and the troponin is the jelly beans (which will move the tropomyosin). See? Perfect.
I'm inclined to say no to sucking out the blood, but I really don't know. It could be hard to get out of the cavernosum once it's coagulated. I also don't know if it'd be necessary since you could just open the upper half of the casket. Then there's always duct tape.

Oh, Rawbean, you got me all figured out.

berly02 said...

I am at a loss for words.

Gentleman-hobbs said...

A chap could always try a looly stick. Mind you viagra is quite amazing too especial at a 40th birthday party. Even the dog couldn't get up stairs all night

Gentleman-hobbs said...

I meant to say put it in the cake

Heather said...

Rigor mortis does not affect the penis. I have seen hundreds of dead bodies, and not 1 erect penis on a dead body. The dead don't sit up, or twitch either. They also don't talk back, or do my taxes. Rigor mortis can be relieved by flexing the limbs, and it doesn't come back. Its exciting, I know.

Px said...

rigor mortis affects the muscles and joints...and as a peniis doesn't have either...no rigor mortis.
however, if a man suffers a spinal injury, this can lead to an erection...not sure why though, maybe trib can help there too

Princess Pessimism said...

Trib - Pictures??? Well well, arent you going beyong the call of duty on this one. =)

Berly - WHY??? Come on...its fun!

Gentleman-hoobs - LOL!! If you meant to say put it in the cake, you were VERY subtle about it! hahaha...And whats a looly stick?

Princess Pessimism said...

HEATHER!!!! - I know you read, thats why I said Morticians...I knew it would get you to comment...finally! LOL...Wouldnt it be nice if corpses did your taxes? What a cottage industry THAT would be! LOL

3 weeks girl..3 weeks today. I cant believe it!!!

PX - Yes, that sould make for an interesting answer.

Trib said...

I've seen one erection and he didn't have an implant. The pump up kind are my favorite, though, they remind me of Reebok Pumps.
I'm just going to guess on the spinal cord injury, but if you lost the sympathetic chain ganglion you could have over-riding parasympathetics and just stay up (possibly).
Yes, the picture, don't they look like golf clubs? And they may not do your taxes, but one lady was totally giving me "the eye." Flirty corpses.

Natalia said...

ROTFL...have you see clerks?

-N

Princess Pessimism said...

LOL!!! YA...Natalia, I have...and I didnt even think of that when I wrote this post. LOL!!! You're awesome! LOL

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