Tuesday, April 25, 2006

The Secret Smokers


...immediately, if you are reading this blog, and that title means something to you...you are already laughing. You know who you are.

So me and my friends...we blackmail one another. Its the nature of our friendship....really. We blackmail one another. I hold pictures of some of my friends, that would get them in a lot of trouble...with their parents. Thats right....their parents.

Like, for example....I have one picture. "The Secret Smoker". There are 2 pictures of said person, holding a cigarette...their parents dont know that they smoke. One of the pictures, could be a little questionable, becuase they might have been holding it for someone else. However, the second one...Its a close up of their head, and cigarette smoke swiriling out of their mouth. And not only do I have photographic evidence, I ALSO have video footage. When this person realized that they were being filmed, they said to the person videotaping "XX, I'm gonna fucking kill you". All because their afraid of their mother finding out.

I have another friend...and Ive got a picture of them holding a bong in front of their face, lighting it....This picture makes me laugh...a LOT. When I showed it to them, they flipped out, and said "well...you cant even tell thats me"....You can totally tell who it is. And yes, the bong may be covering their face, but haircut, and jewelry are a dead give away. Now, I understand that this picture might get you in a little more trouble than the "Secret Smoker"...but come on, we're between 25-30 years old.....isnt it time that we fess up our secret behavious? Either that, or keep clicking pictures you know, will be your saving grace. Thats the thing. With these pictures in my possession, I know for SURE..that no matter what I do, having these pictures, will keep me out of shit...at least for a while.

Actually, to be perfectly honest...i was going to do something nice. For these two peoples birthdays, I was going to wrap up the pictures, and the negatives, AND film....and give it to them as their gift. Level the playing feild to speak....However, one of these two people has ruined it for both of them...and I am no longer doing that....but am keeping these pictures under lock and key...for VALID reason. LOL!!! I've said it...I'm a mean adult...its okay.

They may be our parents, but we all know that they no longer have the authrity to punish us for our misdeeds. I feel that this secret behavior comes from fear of disappointing them. We know that said behavior would disappoint them, so instead of not doing them, we keep them secret.

I know for certain, that I am not perfect...and have some secret behaviors of my own. Like....for example. I pluck my eyebrows while i'm on the phone. LOL!!! Not always, but sometimes. And the other stuff? Well....Regardless of what I do that may be classified as "secret" it doesnt really matter...no one has a picture of it. =)

29 comments:

yrautca said...

Hmmm. so then one should be careful sharing any questionable pics with you..hmmmm.

I find it hard to believe that somebody's parents will disown them for smoking cigarettes. If its something else then there is a chance. Cig smoking is for 13 year olds, for crying out loud.

Princess Pessimism said...

Yrautca - LOL!!! I dont know what it is to be honest. Its just something that has carried over from years of hiding it. It find it quite entertaining really.

Miss Ash said...

I forgot about those pictures. With that being said i still find it hard to believe that as an adult who is almost 30, you would want to "blackmail" or hurt your friends. Strange.

As for pictures, i have one of Jason and his Mangina and one of Tim naked covering his bits in a drunken stupor in Grand Bend. Both hilarious but i would never use either as some type of blackmail.

Jennifer said...

I think blackmailing someone is more childish than being a secret smoker, or a secret pot smoker. Also, you're lucky you didn't get the pot smoker arrested by developing pictures of them engaged in an illegal activity.

Dawn said...

I must say that I immediately started to laugh when i read this blog...and I was at work so I look even sillier...I have had several of these pictures as well but I have honestly shown them to the person and let them decide what to do with them...needless to say they were quickly destroyed...you're welcome miss ash!

Princess Pessimism said...

Miss Ash - LOL...You, who have known me for the longest in my life, would know that I would never use these pictures to hurt these people....They're just really funny to have around.

Besides, I remember the one person with the bong, asked for a picture of the other person with the smoke to have...and then when I said that if I gave that picture to them, I would have to be fair, and give the picture of the bong to the one with the smoke....for fair play, They protested...but laughed, becuase its all a funny joke...as we just like to tease one another. Its not just me Ash...and if either of those people should read this blog, they would both know that those pictures are safe....dont make me feel guilty...LOL!!

Princess Pessimism said...

Dawn - HORRAY!!! You started to laugh immediately, thats funny. I dont have any pictures of you..we've tried, but you're quick hunnie! haha.

The pictures are just good for a laugh once in a while....im sure we'll have a few of them coming out of vegas. Jennifer still wants to go to the dessert and bury someone...THAT would make for a good picture. LOL!!!

rawbean said...

You definitely need to hang on to those pics. Not so much because you want to blackmail them but in case they want to blackmail you - you can use it to fight back.

I know something about a coworker and whenever he starts being an asshole I mention the incident I know about and he shuts up. You get the idea. It's not mean, it's smart.

Princess Pessimism said...

Rawbean - That is funny...not that you would ever use it to get him in serious trouble of anything, its just for fun

berly02 said...

Ahhhh . . . I remember hiding pictures in my dorm room when my parents were coming down. Of course, these pictures were of beer bottles and such.

Phil said...

Princess- You reap what you sew. What goes around comes around. Karma. Yin/yang. I'm willing to bet your "friends" are now secretly plotting to capture proff of your secret behaviors. The real secret ones that you won't admit here.

angel, jr. said...

It's fun when you can still play childish "tattle-tale" games with your friends. It means you really are friends.

Katie said...

Thats great stuff pp....I need some pics liket that os my friends....i have some of my x doing some stuff, maybe i should send them to his mom???
lol i wont do that...well maybe i will..lol

SouthernGentInChicago said...

so you're just going to leave us hanging like that about your other 'secret' activities? that's so mean ;)...do tell - maybe we can trade tit for tat?

Natalia said...

I told my parents right away when I started smoking. I don't think there is anything anyone could bklackmail me with. My parents know I am not a saint. And they are OK with it cause I am a good person.

Hmmm I wonder if anyone has anything that they think they can blackmail me with at all????

Brain working now.

-N

Princess Pessimism said...

Berly - LOL...I still do that. But im not hiding pictures...

Phil - If they are plotting to capture my "secret behaviors"...trust me, they'll let me know about it. I enjoy a good plot. Even if im the subject.

Angel - Yes, I do have a friend that usually threatens "I'm telling your mother"...we laugh about it.

KT - NO no..you should photocopy them. Keep the originals, send the copies to your ex...and then use those as a tool. LOL!!!

Southern Gent - Uhh...LOL! Yes, I will keep you hanging. Thats what keeps the readers coming bcak for more.

Natalia - Ohh...wouldnt that be lovely if we all had your courage?

Sexy Suburbanite said...

Wow, how silly that they are afraid for their parents to know. My parents are super judgemental about stuff like that but I still didn't hide it (too hard) when I started smoking -- I was 18, and that IS an adult.

That said, I'm sure some people have secret smoker pictures of me that they could TOTALLY use as blackmail (beacause I would do anything for Hubby not to see them). I don't smoke often, but when I do I hide it from Hubby. It's really my only secret from him. I was a smoker when we met and he helped me through lots of hard times to quit. He was okay with me being a smoker, but now that I made a conscious decision to quit and put myself through Hell over it he is insistent that I NOT fall back off the horse. He doesn't think that I can just have a cig every now and then and not fall back into my old habits and he is very stern with me about it. So, I hide it (especially in photos -- I either hold it behind someone else or drop it for the photo) and I threaten friends who might have the power to reveal the truth. But, like I said, I almost never smoke (maybe once in the last year) so it's not too hard to hide.

Lindsey said...

I don't smoke...can't stand it. But I do pluck my eyebrows in the car. It's the best light to work by. :o)

Princess Pessimism said...

S.Subs - LOL!!!! I cant even tell you how many pictures we have been getting ready for, when someone says "Get that pack of cigarettes off the table!!!". Also I know of people that have dropped them, or hidden them behind backs. THAT is funny...I laughed out loud.

Linny - LOL!! Ya....i agree, outside light is the most natural light.

Scott said...

Excellent post.. I say send out the pictures... do what you will with them.

Cool blog by the way. I am a former Windsorite, now living in Toronto.

Scott

Princess Pessimism said...

Scott - LOL!!! I was thinking about it, but then decided that I wanted to keep my friends.

Big Ben said...

If you are embarrassed that your parents will know of something that you are doing, then you probably shouldn't do it (unless its anal).

Princess Pessimism said...

Ben - Is "anal" the only exception to that rule??? What about murder? Or voting republican???

Princess Pessimism said...

Jennifer - I did NOT even see your comment between ash and dawns until now. WOW...My bad.

First of all. There is NO WAY that the people who developed the picture would have any idea who the pot smoker was. And even if they confiscated the picture, id deny that it was anyone I knew. Deny deny deny...have I taught you anything?? LOL!

Wait wait wait. I agree, blackmailing IS immature...and you know that I would never use those pictures against them ever. HOwever, I DO know someone who blackmailed the "secret smoker", about something else. And managed to get cookies every once in a while out of the deal. Thats not immature? At least I never got these people to do anything...I just have them incase any of my "secret behaviors" wind up on film. Then we make a fair trade. Get it???

Jennifer said...

If you aren't going to do anything with the pictures then you know what you need to do...

yrautca said...

are we going to witness a fight among ash, PP, and jenn. Like a wrestling match. I have lived for the day.

Princess Pessimism said...

Jenni - Yup I do. Sit on them, until those people get something good on me, and then trade. LOL!!! Kidding.

Yrautca - Uhh..there will be NO fighting here. Its all in good fun.

Amichai said...

A good freind of mine has stated that he will never run for office because there are far too many high school and college pictures (and video) out there that show him getting stoned. It's a shame because I'd vote for him.

Liz said...

You are THE reason I fear having my picture online. :)