Thursday, February 16, 2006

The Pick Up Artist

....I was convinced this story was "blog worthy"....it was something I never thought to mention...but here it is. In honor of valentintes day. *even though it's late*...

Most of you read the post I wrote some time ago, where I said that the best pick up line I ever herad was from a guy named Ritchie, at a MMA tournament in Montreal, when he said "Hey...Wanna Go Halves on a baby?"

However, I shared, last night, the story of a time someone was hitting on me. A few years back, living in Windsor *for the first time*, I was at a bar called "Howl at the Moon". One of the greatest clubs in the city...which is now called "the Beach", but it's still just as fun. I am with a bunch of people, guys and girls....Janury 2000.

While we're all dancing away, me and my friend JR decide to hit the bar and refresh our drinks. A group of guys is standing against the bar, and one of these guys takes it upon himself to use his worst pick up line on me. Which is a bold move, considering that I was with a guy right beside him....and JR's hot, and muscular, and intimidating...but this guy didnt care.

He leans over and says "Ohhh...dont I know you?" I barely glance at this guy and say "Nope". He says "ohh...come on girl...I think I know you from somewhere." To which I actually look him in the face and say "Oh, No...I doubt it"....

His friends are all paying attention, and cheering him on. JR is also paying attention, but not laughing because this guy's a complete moron....although, JR knows me well, and can imagine that i'm trying to think of something witty to say to him.

Again, this stranger leans in and says "Oh baby...i know I know you from somewhere? You know where I think that is?" And before he can say "my dreams" or something else to that stupid effect, I turn to him completely, sigh audibly and say with a totally straight face "Yes...you do know me. I'm the receptionist at the STD test center."

His jaw hits the floor, his friends die laughing, I grab my drink off the bar, and JR grabs my other hand and leads me off to the dance floor.

23 comments:

Trib said...

SNAP! But what were you doing out with my brother?

Princess Pessimism said...

Trib - He didnt tell you???

Natalia said...

Um...what's this I hear about you and Disney in November???

-N

JM said...

Wow!

SS said...

We have Howl at the Moon here -- it is a dueling pianos bar. Is it the same in Windsor? I wish I remember the names of the bars I've been to in Windsor.

Tai said...

Brilliance!

Trib said...

I thought it was a different canadian princess pessimism.

Princess Pessimism said...

Natalia - Are you guys discussing me now? LOL!!! Yes..i'm coming to Disney in November. LOL...I made a public comment about it on the Sexy Suburbanites Blog....I thought you saw...My bad.

S.Subs - No no..it was nothing like that. I'm surprised you never went when you came to windsor, it was a huge bar right downtown on the main street, right by Woody's *if you know where that one was...Oh...oh...or Across the stree from Jokers'...that was a popular bar the americans hung out at...*

Tai - Thanks. LOL

Princess Pessimism said...

Trib - OHHH....Well i'm glad we cleared that all up for you. =)

yrautca said...

Were you really a receptionaist at the STD centre? Is it true you could have caught one of those just by talking to people who had them?

Jennifer said...

No Yrautca, PP got all of hers the old-fashioned way.

Miss Ash said...

I read about this in an email or a magazine once. Funny things to say to annoying men who are trying to pick you up.

Princess Pessimism said...

Miss Ash - Ya...I know...LOL! It worked.

rawbean said...

Hernesto - we have more medals than the Americans - haha!

yrautca said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Lindsey said...

Oh geez. Just another testament to what morons we have to deal with. Perfect comeback though! I wish I could be so witty on my feet.

berly02 said...

Nice.
That was the best ever.

Princess Pessimism said...

Hernesto - I dont watch the olympics, and I dont care who has more medals. Where is this competative conversation coming from? Who cares? Dont be so childish.

Yrautca - PLEASE keep your horriffic and disgusting homosexual comments OFF of my blog. I have already said that I refuse to tolerate such ignorance. This is the last time I will tell you.

Linny and Berly - LOL...thanks.

rawbean said...

By the way Princess P - excellent comeback. I should have said that in my first comment, but instead I got all caught up in the olympics.

Princess Pessimism said...

Rawbean - You are TOO funny. But thank you. I just read your DCFC post....loved it.

rawbean said...

Oh, hi slopmaster...should I tell Princess Pessimism that you called us both POSERS over at my blog??

(Picture me glaring in your direction slopmaster)

Princess Pessimism said...

Rawbean - Its how he shows us he loves us.

Spider Girl said...

"...receptionist at the STD centre..."
(Badda-bing! *crashes cymbals on drum set*)

That's brilliant!